Blogging is so back baby.
In case you didn’t know, I got my start in the world of fashion media as a YouTuber in seventh grade, in 2011. My love for talking about what’s on my mind dates all the way back to my prepubescent days, balancing orthodontist appointments with Latin tutoring (for me, not by me), and making time to film and upload VS Pink hauls and “Pretty Little Liars” inspired makeup tutorials from my childhood bedroom in Dorchester, Boston’s largest neighborhood.
I vlogged (video blogged) pretty much my entire teenagehood, like a public diary for the world to see. I filmed days in my life as a high schooler, how I got into college, what art school in New York City was like as a student at Parsons The New School for Design, and probably most regrettably and notably, various experiences of mine as an employee at the problematic retailer, Brandy Melville. Yikes…
Take an acting class.
The COVID pandemic, and —what was to me— a nasty breakup, made me want to stop sharing most aspects of my life and mind with the digital public for a very, very long time. For the last four years, I have been very cautious with the image that I choose to curate of myself, predominately online, but I’ve noticed it seeping into my reality as well, and that kind of grosses me out.
I recently spent two months studying Lee Strasberg’s Method, a psychological form of acting that is concerned with the reason why things are the way they are in a script. I plan on returning to these classes in the fall as I find the work to be fascinating, but more than acting technique, I felt like I was spending six hours a day in this building on Santa Monica and Western, just learning how to be human again.
We did exercises that forced us to sit with our anxiety and confront our tension; something I think I’ve learned how to avoid my entire adult life. After the first few times of it feeling like I was only working myself into a tizzy of even worse tension and anxiety, I kept with it, and slowly started to recognize the beneficial, meditative aspects to these techniques.
In hindsight, I spent two months learning how to express again. How to not be so withholding, and how to accept myself as a vulnerable being. All of this to say, acting class made me want to share again. More than just superfluous TikToks, but maybe not long-form YouTube videos, and I’ve always loved writing (re: My editorial intern days at the magazine L’Officiel), so that’s what brings us here.
Seriously though, even if you despise the thought of being an actor, if you’ve ever felt lost, take an acting class! I can’t express enough how much your mentality will benefit from it.
I’m not entirely sure what I’m creating as I write this… Is it a blog? Is it a newsletter? Will I get bored of doing this after a couple entries and abandon it to never look back? WHO KNOWS! But I’m here to share my thoughts (hopefully regularly, most likely whenever I feel extra compelled to) on what I’ve been up to, things I’ve been loving AND hating, and whatever’s been living in my head rent free at that point in time.
Very much inspired by my friend and acting class peer, Grace Dougherty’s, Jelly Sandwich, I have decided that substack is the writing platform of my generation. This page will be for the girls, gays, and theys who read fashion magazines, love pop culture, shop at the thrift store and flea markets, and want to mature into their best Sex and The City style adulthood. The bitches who are crafty and thrifty but want to be chic and iconic: the girlies like me.
Coming up…
I don’t think my thoughts are worthy of your payment so for now this is an entirely free newsletter. No exclusive content you’re missing out on, I hate that feeling, no shade.
I plan on writing about the current weeks I’m spending in New York, back on my old stomping grounds, my crazy first week here hanging with Kim Petras, meeting Charli XCX and licking The Dare, and all the crazy horror stories that come with the job of being a model and influencer (gag - negative). So stay tuned for the glitz and glamour, and stick around for the silly thoughts from my questionable mind.